Coordinating your tuxedo with your partner's dress

A couple only needs to look as if they came from the same evening, not as if they were issued the same uniform. The secret is harmony rather than a match: a shared tone, one small thread linking the two outfits, and enough difference that each person remains themselves.

You do not need to match, only to harmonise

A bow tie and a dress in an identical red often feel as if they were ordered together, and slightly saccharine. Harmony means:

• The same colour family: wine red with burgundy; emerald with midnight blue; champagne gold with black.
• The same level of formality: a floor-length gown calls for a classic black tuxedo; a short cocktail dress allows a lighter suit.
• The same material or sheen: a satin gown with a satin lapel; a velvet-trimmed dress with a velvet jacket.

Do not ask your partner the colour of her dress in order to copy it; ask so you know which shade to avoid. If the dress is a certain blue, a bow in exactly that blue will vanish against it. Pick a black or neutral bow instead.

A bow or pocket square that echoes her dress

The most refined approach is one small detail that recalls the dress:

• A pocket square whose colour or pattern repeats a shade of the dress, folded flat or with a soft three-point peak. A square only, not a matching bow as well.
• A silk or velvet bow in a soft shade that sits with the dress, while jacket and trousers stay classic black.
• A cummerbund in the same shade, if you wear a cummerbund instead of a waistcoat.

Choose only one of the three. If the bow echoes the dress, keep the pocket square white. See coloured and patterned pocket squares and matching bow, lapel and cummerbund colours.

One example: TUX-019 in sapphire blue with a shawl collar made from the jacket cloth, an ivory bow and a paisley pocket square. It works with an ivory or nude dress because the ivory bow picks up her tone without repeating the jacket's blue.

A vivid dress calls for a classic tuxedo

If your partner chooses scarlet, cobalt or deep pink, let the dress be the statement. A black single-button tuxedo with a shawl or satin peak lapel is the sensible partner: the black makes the colour stand out and the two of you look balanced. The classic black suits in the black collection are a reliable backdrop.

Conversely, if the dress is minimal, black or ivory, you can take a coloured tuxedo such as TUX-097, burgundy with a black satin peak lapel, or TUX-120, ivory with a black shawl lapel and a polka-dot bow tie. Then the tuxedo is the statement.

The general rule: one of you vivid, one of you quiet. Both vivid, and you compete.

If you would like the other side of the picture, black tie for a woman as a guest discusses how she can choose a gown, shoes and accessories.

Photographing as a couple

A good couple photograph depends on posture and distance as much as clothes:

• Stand close but not stuck. A fist's width between you is enough, shoulders angled slightly towards each other.
• The tuxedo wearer stands straight, one hand in a trouser pocket or resting lightly at her waist; avoid arms hanging stiff.
• Button the jacket while standing for the shot, unbutton when seated. Watch the skirt of her dress: your jacket should not press on it.
• Choose a light background with some distance. A dark one swallows the black of the tuxedo; a lighter one gives better contrast.
• Smile naturally, look at each other for a beat and then at the camera.

For your own posture, see standing, sitting and walking in a tuxedo.

How Mon Amie can help

If you already know your partner's dress, bring a photograph or a swatch to the showroom. The tailor can lay it beside the cloth of the bow, pocket square and cummerbund and pick harmonious shades on the spot. You can book a fitting at a showroom together.