Áo dài for the ancestral rite, tuxedo for the party

A men's áo dài with khăn đóng for the ancestral rite and a tuxedo for the evening reception make a natural pair: one keeps the traditional spirit of the morning, the other brings the formality of the night. What makes the pair work or fall out of step is the colour of the two outfits and how you move from one to the other.

Áo dài and khăn đóng for the ancestral rite

The ancestral rite takes place at home, before the family altar, so the outfit should be solemn and correct to custom. The familiar men's áo dài is made in brocade or patterned silk, worn with long trousers in white or a matching tone, a khăn đóng turban-style cap, and suitable shoes.

• Common colours: deep red, dark blue, brown, copper gold or black; in many families the groom's and bride's sides coordinate colours so the two harmonise.
• Brocade patterns (such as the Thọ character or round motifs) give an áo dài depth without extra decoration.
• The khăn đóng should fit the head and sit firmly so it does not shift when you bow.

For the question of when an áo dài can take the place of a tuxedo, see áo dài instead of a tuxedo, and for the engagement ceremony, this article.

Tuxedo for the evening

In the evening the tuxedo takes over, since it is the conventional dress for events after the afternoon. At the reception you greet guests, pose for photographs and raise a glass, so the outfit must be neat and comfortable.

• Black or midnight blue tuxedo, shawl or peak lapel faced in satin, white shirt, hand-tied bow tie.
• A waistcoat or cummerbund if you like, so the outline stays clean when the jacket comes off for dancing with the bride.
• Clean, polished patent shoes or opera pumps.

Evening models are on the wedding tuxedo page; you can also see TUX-072, a classic black three-piece if you want a waistcoat.

Matching the two colours

The two outfits follow one another in a single day, so the colours need a thread between them, without repeating.

Ancestral-rite áo dài	Evening tuxedo	Note
Deep red, red brocade	Black with black satin lapels	Red and black is a formal pair; choose a black bow tie or a small red touch in the pocket square
Dark blue	Midnight blue or black	Two deep blues sit close; vary the shirt and bow tie to separate them
Brown, copper gold	Black or charcoal	The áo dài carries warm colour, the tuxedo stays neutral
White or cream	Black or navy	Avoid an ivory tuxedo right after a white áo dài; the two outfits repeat each other

Account for the bride as well: if she wears a red áo dài in the morning and a white gown in the evening, the groom follows the same rhythm. The principles for choosing the wedding tuxedo are in wedding tuxedos for the groom.

Time to change

Changing from áo dài to tuxedo takes more effort than expected: remove the khăn đóng, take off the áo dài, change trousers and shoes, tie the bow tie, tidy the hair. Do not plan it too tightly.

• Leave a clear gap between the end of the rite and the time guests arrive at the reception, enough for changing, resting and a light bite.
• Prepare a clean changing room with a mirror and a place to hang clothes.
• Ask a relative to look after the khăn đóng and áo dài, and put them in their own box to be used again.
• Hang a brocade áo dài on a hanger; do not fold it, because folds in brocade are hard to flatten again.

A fuller plan for all three stages is in changing between ceremony and reception.

Book a fitting at Mon Amie

When you come for the tuxedo, bring a photograph or fabric sample of the áo dài you have chosen, so the consultant can help you pick a tuxedo, shirt and bow tie that suit the morning outfit. Book a fitting at a showroom.